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About Varied / Student NellieFemale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 5 Years
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Shed Them With Me
The trees were bent and twisted,
Jagged and ugly,
They knew exactly what was wrong.
The bark darkened,
Leaves brown and crunchy,
She took them in her palms,
Squeezed hard.
Took the life out of it,
That's what she does best.
Ripping them off one by one,
Making each life useless,
Too her.
Peeling them apart,
With a wicked smile,
Hands working quickly,
With wicked happiness.
The clouds rejected,
Voicing their opinions loudly,
Shedding there hatred for the girl,
The girl didn't mind,
She welcomed the attention.
Everything darkened,
Everything was loud,
Everything was filled with hate.
Everything hated everything.
Who caused this?
Who started it?
No one knows.
A circle with no bounds.
The girl was breaking down.
Got tired of ruining the trees,
Got bored of the cries,
She curled up in the pile,
The same pile that she had created,
And she gave in,
Cried the tears she should've shed in the first place..
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 1 0
I can still hear your voice,
soft as the snow,
I can still feel your touch,
light and blazing,
I can still feel your kiss,
light and fluttery,
I can't feel your love,
Gone with the wind,
I can't feel the hope,
Drowned in the river,
I can't feel happiness,
Lost in the flood.
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 0 0
The Nothingness
Fall down with me,
Fall into nothingness,
It's what I want,
Don't you see?
It eats everything,
Until there's nothing left but,
blackness and echoing laughs,
crys of pain in the dark,
crys of loneliness,
crys of fear,
lost in the deep,
dark blackness.
We are here,
on the edge,
I can't go down there,
I want too,
Too fall in and look up,
And think,
"There's no going back, good."
Stay down there forever,
Not to cause pain and hurt.
Feel the softness,
The love,
Coming our way,
Don't give up on it just yet,
It brushes by,
Assuring you that it's still there,
But when will it show itself?
You have to wait, my love.
I'll take your hand and we'll walk,
Down the path of the future,
When you're ready, I'll let go,
Don't worry,
I'm still here now,
Let my hand go,
Let it go,
Let us go..
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 0 2
The Key That Didn't Fit
I had the key,
No, a key,
It didn't fit,
But I didn't know,
You didn't care,
For the sake of everything,
How I wanted that key to fit,
Like how our hands did,
You saw my motions,
The gestures,
The effort,
But all you did was laugh,
Laugh at it,
You didn't care,
Not one bit,
It hurts,
to think of all we could've had,
All we could've shared,
But m'dear it's over,
You need to move on,
I need too,
The key doesn't fit,
The key is broken,
Shattered like the remains of us,
Bent like the lies,
Dull like the boredom,
The shine gone,
The sunshine gone,
The stars are pale,
They don't shine with brilliance,
They shine with lies,
How far are they?
So close.
They look so close.
We were so close.
What happened?
You gave up,
You locked up,
You stopped up,
I kept giving,
You didn't do anything.
That's why we're here now,
That's why, because of you.
Because of you.
Because of you.
I don't mean to point fingers.
Pointed like the sharp knife,
the knife that's in my heart,
the one you
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 1 3
Shattered and bruised,
Will my heart ever heal?
I know I've been confused,
What will this reveal?
I know I've hurt you,
But believe me,
I bit off more then I could chew,
You have to agree.
I broke what we had,
Threw it all away,
Watched it go bad,
Stressed everyday.
We've withdrawn,
But escape,
Move on,
Change your shape.
Be happy my dear,
We must
The world is not to fear,
We must adjust.
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 3 0
Tribal Void by JanelNellie Tribal Void :iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 5 7
Sick And Vile Thing
Take a look at the cracked glass,
Walk down the reflection,
The one I need to outlast,
And break the connection.
Take my hammer,
Smash it in to pieces,
Ignore the clamor,
Be careful of what it releases.
Sweep up the shards,
Into the dark  pile,
Get past what it guards,
So sick and vile.
Throw it in the fire,
Let it all burn,
To get what I require,
But I first have to learn.
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 0 0
The Star
If I could make one wish,
It wouldn't be for world peace.
The world has hate for a reason,
So we could love.
It wouldn't be for money.
I don't need money to make me happy.
It wouldn't be for a home,
I have a home, I don't need a better one.
It wouldn't be for material things.
I'm lucky to have what I do.
My one wish would be for you.
Just to have you.
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 1 2
Dark Sea
Love is unexpected,
You find it when you're not looking,
To see that person and feel connected,
Without even touching.
I didn't try to find it,
It just came to me,
Didn't expect to fit,
I'm the lock and you're the key.
Who knew I'd find it like this,
So young and early,
You pulled me out of the abyss,
Our relationship new and pearly.
I saved you,
I didn't plan it,
I pulled you through,
I didn't think about it in the least bit.
But love,
You saved me,
Made me free of,
That dark sea.
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 0 0
I lie here breathing,
By with you beside me,
Our fingers intertwined,
Looking up into the sky,
I feel so happy,
Light and floaty,
Being with you,
Makes the world magic,
Makes me see the meaning of life,
Makes me see things,
I didn't think I could see,
We just lie here looking up,
Pointing at the stars,
They slowly start swirling,
I'm not scared,
They get pulled together,
The sky turns into a screen,
It shows our life together,
Us playing around,
Us having kids,
Us raising them,
Us growing old,
Us having grandchildren,
Us getting old,
Us dying with each other,
Us in the afterlife,
Where we will be forever,
Forever together,
I roll on my side and look at you,
You look back,
I smile,
And you do the same,
I breathe out,
You nod and point at the sky,
When I look,
It's just a starry night sky again..
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 1 5
Our Own World
My heart is beating hard,
When I see your eyes,
I see happiness,
I smile at you,
You do too,
I can tell,
Without even looking at your mouth,
I can see it in your eyes,
Your beautiful eyes,
I pull away slightly,
We don't say anything,
There's nothing to say,
But I can tell you didn't like when I pulled away,
So I come back,
You smile even wider,
There's still nothing to say,
When we look into each other's eyes,
We are having our own conversation,
One that doesn't need to be voiced,
Only your eyes could express this,
I love it,
We're quiet,
But it's the type of quiet,
That's not awkward,
That's perfect,
I could be like this forever,
But sadly I have to pull away,
I get up and run,
I know you'll follow me,
We run past the stars,
The planets,
The galaxy,
Into our own little world,
A beautiful world,
Just for us,
Where we can be ourselves,
It's beautiful there,
Everything's happy and alive,
Glowing and vibrant,
The skies are either blue,
Or the sun is setting,
The water is still,
The weathe
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 1 4
Tag Along
Cut it out,
Out of every part of my life,
I have no doubt,
If I use this knife,
I won't have to worry,
You'll be gone,
I'm not going to hurry,
Make it last till dawn.
You deserve it for being here,
You don't belong,
I just want you to disappear,
I'm tired of you, tag along.
Stop trying to punish me,
What did I do?
I've got the key,
Break you and break through.
You don't own me,
I broke the chain,
Now I just want to be,
Stop the pain.
I'm not looking back,
Your unwelcome,
Turning back on track,
Why I was so dumb?
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 0 0
Never Sever
My heart,
You have it,
I never want to be apart,
I have to admit.
It's in your clutches,
Your love it's so strong,
Helps everything it touches,
I feel it all day long.
I never knew love could be so powerful,
So amazing all in itself,
Everything feels so natural,
Makes someone find oneself.
Never felt love like this,
From any other,
Perfect bliss,
I won't take another.
You're my soul mate,
The one they say is hard to find,
It has to be fate,
I still can barely grasp it in my mind.
But I have no doubt,
Stay with me forever,
You're the one I can't live without,
This relationship I can't sever.
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 1 1
Your Sun, My Moon
If I look hard enough I can see us,
I look at my hands,
Look back up into the sky,
Thinking it seems like no one understands.
But I don't need someone's approval,
I've got you and that's all I need,
Don't need anyone else,
'Cuz I know we'll suceed.
Don't worry I'll be by your side,
I'll never leave,
Don't be sad,
I know we are a bit naïve.
That won't stop me,
I know you're the one,
I don't have any doubts,
I'll always be your sun.
You'll be there for me,
You'll be here soon,
We can wait,
You'll always be my moon.
We'll wait till the end of time,
As long as I know you'll be mine.
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 1 0
Looking into the dark sky,
Thinking of how I'm going to get by,
Watching the stars shine,
Thinking I'll be just fine,
Looking at the darkness,
Thinking of how to be thoughtless,
Looking at the moon,
Thinking of how you'll be here soon,
Looking at the sky and letting go,
Thinking and feeling the love I feel from head-to-toe.
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 2 0
A Fuss
If I walk 1,000 miles,
Through all the tricks and the trials,
The one thing I somehow caught,
This empty spot,
Sitting in my heart,
But it won't fall apart,
Not yet,
Don't fret,
I know that one day,
It won't give way,
You'll be there to fill in the space,
The one I can't replace.
I would wait for you until I die,
I know your nearby,
I won't give in,
I won't wear thin,
I'm staying strong,
'Cause I know we belong,
Side by side,
Be each other's guide,
Through all the hardships,
We'll make it through without even a chip,
Nothing in the armor of us,
It didn't even make a fuss.
:iconjanelnellie:JanelNellie 1 2


Skater pass by remdesigns Skater pass :iconremdesigns:remdesigns 3 2 Moonchild by bear48 Moonchild :iconbear48:bear48 127 95 MOLESKINE Cover by Vivivillarreal MOLESKINE Cover :iconvivivillarreal:Vivivillarreal 2 3
lock the door
the sun shines when we sleep
and the moon glows when we awake
hold me closer,
hold me closer,
feel my heart beat
and i'll feel yours
but i have all along
and we can stroll outside,
with the stars aglow in their silly, far-away games
with ideas of cold
far and long behind
and dragging
but i have all along
just remember to lock the door
:iconwolfbyte0:WolfByte0 0 1
holding on
hold me closer
and look in my eyes,
see what i really mean
maybe you do
but probably you don't
maybe you'll find more than answers
to my questions,
the ones i already knew
maybe you'll find more
maybe yourself
(but i scrapped that idea)
we held hands
on the crosswalk
watching cars
and planes
and friendships
and feelings
and people,
and many other fast moving things
he doesn't look a think like a savior,
with street clothes
and a dignity lacking in confidence
he doesn't look like your kind of savior
but maybe he'll hold onto you longer than reality ever could
:iconwolfbyte0:WolfByte0 0 0
with ideas we danced;
we played with strings of the heart
we played with them
with the music
with the sound and shelter
time doesn't heal
every wound
time doesn't heal
every scar
i don't need an answer,
i just need to stay here and play music with her
i just need to finish this sheet of notes
before i leave
before i leave
possibly forever
don't take me
don't take me away
with ideas we danced,
coordinating our footsteps
it sure is pretty out, tonight
(but perhaps a bit cold)
i don't need to go home,
i cried
i don't need to go back
i have everything i need
i have everything i want
i have reason
and i died
all the way home,
the moon my own witness of sorrow
(i try to forget
all the notes that i wrote
while in the presence of her;
all the lyrics i scribbled
and the smiles i wore
and the happiness i shed that night
i try to forget
that i'm not allowed to remember
i try to remember
that i'm supposed to forget
i try to live
but forget how to,
in the midst of duty and desire)
:iconwolfbyte0:WolfByte0 0 8
stitch me up
with your words
[even though
they tear me further and further
heal me
heal me
hug me and hold me
i haven't even asked yet
do i follow the path
or the pavement?
which one leads me home?
:iconwolfbyte0:WolfByte0 1 0
I happen to enjoy dreams.
she dreams
at night but also during day
when the sun is still smiling
and cheery and happy
she dreams
of beautiful colours--
warm reds and browns, cool greens and blues
watching the colours behind her eyes
where is she?
what is she?
the hours sit on her shoulders,
growing heavy as she tries to remember
remember the meaning
remember the feel
remember my own thoughts
her own wishes
her desires
she can't recall
she can't remember
she can't think
but she knows
without a doubt,
she knows where she lies--
upon hills of nostalgia
and under the stars
under the stars
with twinkling eyes
and a shiny smile
she asks
she questions
but doesn't know why
the one with the pretty hair
the one with the guise that reminds her all too much
of love
of friendship
of memory
of her
she reaches out,
with open arms
with open heart
with open mind
please take her, i ask
please take her and show her where she is
and where she belongs
and just who she may be
please do me a favour
and save her life
:iconwolfbyte0:WolfByte0 7 0
living with you
get out of my house,
get out of my head,
get out of my heart
or you'll soon be dead
i only make promises,
i can't tell a lie
unless it means saving you,
but that's gone goodbye
get out of my room
and get out of my life,
get out of my sanity--
it doesn't feel right
shut down your world,
shut down your mind,
shut down it all
'cause i caused an unwind
i'll ruin you someday,
i'll fuck you up bad--
maybe then you'll be sorry
for the shit that we had
maybe then you'll regret
forgetting i'm alive,
maybe then you'll forget
that i tried to die
it's been too long
since i told you these things,
even though you ignore them
and the truth that they bring
i'm sick of it all,
i'm sick of you too
just leave me alone,
i can't live with you
:iconwolfbyte0:WolfByte0 1 0
we're lacking in time,
we're missing our faith.
don't have much longer
'til our effort's erased
work to become
what you'll never be--
a dreamer's on edge
of reality
try to find reason
and try to find hope
you know you don't fit,
so you'll have to cope
with anger and fear,
with sadness and denial
and the lessons learned
aren't worth your while
you'll never get far
if you can't run fast--
the competitions growing
and you're coming in last
gotta adapt, gotta learn,
gotta figure out how
to win this shitty game
when there's no chance right now
i'm not afraid to dream,
but i like to think real--
when you want the impossible,
you'll know how i feel
:iconwolfbyte0:WolfByte0 3 0
With time and trial,
with grit and grin.
With sorrow and sadness
that come from within
I faced a feeling
I'd barely knew,
one I had toyed with
and had broken, too
An idea of wonder,
a goal to set.
Age is but a number,
but my mindset I've kept
I realized, when older,
what I want to be.
I wanted to comfort
a lover with me
I wanted to hug,
to cherish and warm,
to keep safe and comfort
in our lives' storms
Let's not worry,
let's not be scared.
Ignore all emotions
that we couldn't bear
Let's bask in each other,
and stay close in both our sights.
Wake up next to you in morning,
fall asleep in arms at night
We're making a life,
we're writing a script.
We're reading it over
and adding things missed
But it's already perfect,
since it's you and I.
We erase the corrections,
I'm sure we'll get by
It'll be nowhere near perfect,
but that'll be great.
I just wanted to say
that the idea sedates
Too far to work towards,
so I'll just sit back.
Too rare to look for,
so I'll just relax
And I hope you obta
:iconwolfbyte0:WolfByte0 2 11
falling through air
and falling through time,
i never remember just
who did the crime
all i know is that
someone must pay,
since i'll never sleep
if with anxiety i lay
the murderer's out there,
the murderer's mean
he killed my best friend,
he killed off his dreams
i never forgot
his friendly, kind words,
even though he's gone
i pretend he's still heard
i'm in denial,
i'm in some shame,
i didn't stop it
and don't know who's to blame
i'm falling asleep,
a pillow in arms
i don't know the urges,
but i want to do harm
and then i forget
everything i had said
the night before
when my friend was found dead
i forgot all the memories
all the feelings and words,
i forgot about friendship
and remembered the absurd
pulsing with anger,
my heart pounded fast,
if they wanted to hurt me
then the feeling would last
i stormed out in rage,
name no longer mine--
and i've since remembered
that i did the crimes
:iconwolfbyte0:WolfByte0 1 6
cosmic relevance
she carries virtues over her head
a million years before time
she carries the logic
the vision
the sight
its still so alone
so alone...
breaking into banks or
stealing precious jewels
she's nothing to hide but the clothes on her back
accomplish it all,
hand-in-hand with no one but her friend called "alone"
they live together,
with such fond feelings of memory and nostalgia
and all she does is feel hate
with a loathsome mind and crooked heart
and mosaic eyes missing their pupils
all she does is feel
but he broke her
but it broke her
but she's broken
lend her a hand, can we?
pull her out and up from darkness
into the light
into the sight
maybe she'll see us
it's not that she's lived in the dark
due to exile,
we learn
it's due to choice
and need
repress the tears,
she did
and sit in corners of illness and sick moods
thoughts of ending her thoughts
and thinking of thinking
she's a contradiction
and writes the words on walls of creme colour
with beautiful paintings and flowers of
:iconwolfbyte0:WolfByte0 2 0
i found a way to smile this morning
amoungst a few other things
dead-ends and die-offs of ideas
i found a way to grin
albeit sadistic by purpose
the corpse's cause
she fled
i flee
he ran
i run
we hide
from truth
from words
from feelings
from reality
we hide
under piles of blankets, with lovers or sins
beneath veils and shrouds of artificial mystery
behind the tall trees, from the one who is "it"
from all the opinions we never want to consider
we seek our answers
often by simple means
we look for our questions in anxiety
escape the reality
give me difference
give me possibility
give me a hope
although false
give me reason to feed lies
(seeds of untruth,
flowering, blossoming
trees of sins)
and my sickening display
will surely kill,
will surely kill...
more than me and you
more than her and him
more than reality or idealistic constructions
:iconwolfbyte0:WolfByte0 6 1
without dreams
we listen
to their cries of intent
and ignorance
forging the fairy tales
cursing their lies
become my bane
and breathe into me life
amidst thorns
and brambles
and time to be told
it'll give way
and it'll get brighter
open your eyes
open your eyes
it'll be hard at first,
but give me your hand
and i'll give you my shoulder
etching his name into your wrist
carving pumpkins with nostalgia
remember to forget
(don't forget to remember)
open your eyes
two shoes
:iconwolfbyte0:WolfByte0 0 0
This is stupid.
"What's your answer?"
Two birds by a rock,
their life had been stolen.
Thoughts hidden by lock,
her baskets were woven.
No time to reply, no time to blink.
Rushed out the door without time to think.
The noose on his neck,
the bruises by fist.
His house was a wreck,
he died from a list.
Sweet violent offerings, a morbid bouquet.
She smells the dead flowers that die in three days.
Two singular words,
one free-flying spirit,
she sung her few words
though you couldn't hear it.
Calling though space and reaching through time,
fibers of ordinary that only "need" binds.
"Get out of my way."
"Only if you get out of mine."
:iconwolfbyte0:WolfByte0 1 1


  • Listening to: Sleepyhead- Passion Pit
  • Reading: Texts.
  • Watching: Nothing.
  • Playing: Nothing.
  • Eating: Chalky gross vitamin.
  • Drinking: Nothing.
Too short to make into a real poem so I just put it here for everyone to read. I like it but won't continue it I can't figure out how..

We won't live forever,
So let's spend this time together,
Wouldn't have it any other way,
Be with you until we waste away,
Die in each other's hold,
Our story left to be told.


JanelNellie's Profile Picture
Artist | Student | Varied
United States


Add a Comment:
bear48 Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2012  Professional
thank you for adding "Moonchild" to your favorites
kungfucake Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
thanks for the fav!! and your kitty is awesomely cute too
JanelNellie Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2012  Student General Artist
No problem! Why thank you!Her name is Onyx :3
MidnightNinja69 Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2012
hey thanks for the fav! it means a lot! :D
JanelNellie Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2012  Student General Artist
No problem!
MissSebright Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2012  Student General Artist
Thank you! :heart:
JanelNellie Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2012  Student General Artist
Your welcome!
aTmGuy1536 Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
thank you very much for the fav
JanelNellie Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2012  Student General Artist
No problem, your work is amazing.
aTmGuy1536 Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
why thank you [:
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